Are you a follower, or a leader?

It is tempting to tag along the beaten path. A paved road is easier to follow. Indeed, it is made for it, armed with signs for the very purpose to keep you on track. 

This is not only true when on the road though. You can promptly spot “paved ways” and “road signs” wherever set expectations are to be found. Think family, career, even innocuous pastimes. Whenever you hesitate with your own choice, the default enlisting the majority will swiftly pick you up as well - and here you go, well secured on the paved road already!

Yet who says you need to follow? Not all roads are paved - nor need to be. The unbeaten track might be the most challenging, but also the one with the most wonders. Sure, you might get lost in it, even go in a circle a couple of times possibly - and for sure if you have my perfectly rounded (counter)sense of orientation! But how else can you ever stumble on anything new, unless you are also willing to lose sight of those familiar grounds? 

And why not? Being lost might not be a bad thing at all. 

A ship is safe in the harbor, but that is not what ships are built for

John Augustus Shedd

Besides: 

One does not discover new lands without consenting to lose sight of the shore for a very long time - André Gide

In fact, when you stop following, and dare to stray further from the beaten path, you are the one leading and opening a new way - with infinite possibilities lying ahead.

So why so many people settle to follow the (perfectly predictable, but somehow boring) paved road, when instead they can lead on their own (unpredictable, but so much more exciting) adventure? 

I believe I might have found an intriguing answer in what I shall name:

The paved road mentality trap

(Hold yourself now, because what I am about to reveal might irrevocably shake whatever you have been telling yourself so far - and irrevocably stripping excuses from any special consideration whatsoever).

Here you go: We are so used to following those omnipresent signs and directions, that we _expect_ the same “order” and “oversight” when navigating new domains. 

Outwardly, we often find ourselves complaining about those directions. Inwardly, however, we have grown more and more reliant on simply following them. After all, it is easier to have somebody telling us what to do, rather than having to figure out things on our own, isn’t it? 

It is like driving with the convenience of following a navigation system, telling us which turns to take and where to go all along the way. Why bother remembering the way - or anything - on our own then?

This induced reliance (the less commending word would be laziness) should be our wake-up call though. We have become so “domesticated” by our ever-perfecting and orderly society, that - even as we long for adventure and excitement - we shun away at the first sign of chaos and wilderness. 

• Take any unplanned situation:
  Your flight got canceled? - Well, I had shared my own entertaining story in Rule One for you here - do you remember? Your hotel is overbooked? Your car broke in the middle of nowhere? 
• So, what do you do first?
  Probably, before you remember to just breathe, you are already looking around in near panic, tightly holding on to your telephone as if it were your last life vest, hoping to find somebody who can clear all this mess for you. 

I am not just guessing. I know this because I have caught myself there a thousand times - and I have always been in ample company.

Certainly, it is comforting to have somebody taking charge, especially when things do not go as smoothly as planned. Facing the unknown on your own can be scary. But who says that somebody else is going to make the best decision for you - better than you? And, for that matter, who says that the unknown needs to be scary - being “unknown” we cannot know that, right? 

Out of the beaten bath, in for your own adventure

In point of fact, if you and I just think back to some of our fondest memories, they most likely relate to something completely unplanned, taking us “out of the ordinary” - and straight into the “extraordinary”. 

Maybe your little detour led you to the most unlikely and beautiful of all places, or encounters. What is more refreshing than a break in your usual routine, from time to time?

You have to lose yourself to find yourself

Willem Dafoe

Well, beyond straight logic (you can only find something _after_ losing it), there is something irrationally enchanting about being lost - suddenly free, ridden of all directions, and exploring new grounds on your own. 

Unless, of course, upon realizing you are lost, you find yourself stuck in that first moment of sheer terror. Or, like me once in Stockholm, upon realizing at (what was at least supposed to be) the end of my early morning jogging tour that I must have taken the wrong turn somewhere, and found myself in some weird neighborhood, instead of back nearby my hotel, where I was supposed to be taking a quick shower and then heading straight to my customer negotiation - Yes, in case you are wondering, I eventually made it back just in time, and even managed to that a lightspeed shower, after breaking I believe what is still my fastest run record of all time.

In hindsight though, and with no exception, whenever I got lost (including in Stockholm!), I found myself in some unexpected but eventually entertaining situations - or encountered some of the most interesting people - that ended up spicing an otherwise perfectly ordinary, not particularly noteworthy day. Or, I discovered some “hidden gems” that I would have simply missed had I not strayed out of track while wondering about a new place.

After all, just think about it: 

There would be no good story without any unexpected twist. 

You might be temporarily ruffled by the unplanned, but that is also what you just might end up cherishing the most. 

The only question is: Are you game for it?