Happy go lucky. Right?

I only need to tip the words “negative thinking” to immediately ascertain how demonized that is. Broadly and beyond doubt. In fact, the opposite is also true: browsing for “positive thinking” instead will instantly transpose you into a rainbow field of sure happiness and success! 

Swiping from more or less established literature to random internet quotes, here all voices appear to convey an almost unanimous consensus: 

Happy go lucky.

No question about that, right?
Wrong!
Remember: 

The most dangerous beliefs are those we never question.

This modern “witch-hunt” against negativity, in the strive for positivity at all costs, has something fishy about it. 

Nothing unchallenged can hold its “holy” virtue for long.

Avoiding is not dealing with it.

First of all, being around people who seem to wear a perennial smile can be tiring, even annoying. It lacks depth. And authenticity. A human being is a sum of its many emotions - it cannot just be happiness all the time. 

Remember Rule 41? Uncovering the three “C” of Happiness: Contradictions. Chaos. And Compromise.

With every light comes shadows. It is natural, and it does not need to be bad. 

Being an overall positive person is certainly good, for you and those around you. It can be uplifting and inspiring. But it becomes shallow and not very constructive if it makes you oblivious to reality. 

There is no chance of real improvement without acknowledging one’s own faults, together with what went wrong, and being able to deal with it in a mature way - that is, without being an asshole.

Fake it, or make it?

Speaking for me, I am a big fan of yoga, and love being around fellow yogis. But that love for me turns to skepticism the moment it becomes “too much” holiness, and less so credibility. Once I took my husband (not a yogi) to meet some of my (yogi) friends. He ended up with him feeling completely out of depth when the guy whom we thanked for bringing our food responded with “thank you for thanking me”. Well, I had to agree with him, that was a bit weird. But not half so bad as when I observe many self-proclaimed yogis turning their “aura” completely inwardly - that is, becoming so self-absorbed about their yoga attire, their practice, and themselves that they turn blind to everything else.

Finally, to always be positive, no matter what, can be dangerous - let alone self-defying. 

Turning away from problems does not make them disappear. Possibly, it only makes you delusional. Because, unless you are able to deal with it, what is broken stays broken - and what needs fixing stays unfixed. 

There is a saying that:

Better a dreadful ending, than a dread without ending.

Well, at least, that is what I would advise to all hopelessly unhappy couples stuck in a bad relationship. If you cannot change it, move on! The worst thing is to just look the other way. And live unhappily ever after - while having to smile and pretend all the time.