The Coach

Who am I?

That is the jackpot question! The one we might ask ourselves every day. And always come up with a different answer. Often, we are just left wondering...

In a nutshell, the most authentic (and briefest) way I came to define myself today is this:

Writer, at heart. Challenger, by nature. Lawyer, by chance.

In a slightly more long-winded version:

I LOVE getting to know new people, being outside, switching off in the nature, exploring, surfing, jogging, feeling the breeze on my skin, or my pulse after working out, doing yoga, having a good laugh and enjoying good food with friends...
Only few things can beat that!

And for the sake of formal conventions - Of course! Where are my manners?

Hi. My name is Monica.
Please do not write me with a "k". That is the Germanic version. I am a proud Italian (you don't say!). And in Italian, which comes from classic Latin, "k" is not even a letter of the alphabet, so "c" it is.

I was born in the pre-Alpine region of Turin, which gained some degree of celebrity after hosting the Winter Olympic Games in 2006 - And yes, for the Italian automobile manufacturer FIAT... Where T stands for Turin. And no, no more jokes about the meanings of the acronym please! I may risk to laugh too.

I am a lawyer by education, having obtained a double law degree after having graduated
- from both Italy (Turin) and
- France (Nice).

My exposure and curiosity towards different systems, cultures and values marked my way of life from early on.
- After a first stint at the European Parliament, in Brussels,
- I was sought after to work as policy analyst at Microsoft's European Headquarters in Paris.

While my family complaints that I am "forgetting" my Italian though, I became relatively fluent in English, German, French. Spanish is still work in progress((Fact is: a "lazy" Spanish and an Italian person can quite understand each other by each speaking their own language. And a laugh will be guaranteed!)). The true is, it is fun! Learning foreign languages has always been my "secret weapon", getting me in, and out, the most unbelievable situations.

Realising there was so much I still wanted to learn (and still is!), I decided to pursue first an LL.M. and then (why not?) Ph.D. in law, after getting a merit scholarship at the Max Planck Institute for Intellectual Property and Competition law in Munich.

In fact, the life of a Ph.D. student is very similar to the life of a writer... With your professor being your editor. But also with lots of freedom, outside any fix working schedule or location. I think I got addicted to that!

So Germany has become my new "adoptive mother-country", where I have been working as corporate lawyer for different big companies, such as Red Hat, Allianz and Wipro LTD ((If you are really interested in my background, or just curious, here you go. You can check my LinkedIn Profile here: https://www.linkedin.com/in/armillotta))...

Admittedly, as an Italian, the German efficiency never stopped to "astonish" me and eventually won me over. Opposites attract. So for now: I am still here!

My beliefs

But in the face of permanent change, it is our core beliefs that define us.

I believe that...

Change starts with yourself,

Done is better than perfect,

Trying unfailingly defies wondering...

Plus, a few other things like that...

• Filtered coffee is not real coffee... Come on: Espresso is the real thing; ((I know that by this I may be alienating half of the World's population already... But how could I hide such truth from you? If you are still doubting, just go spend some time in Italy... Or at least with some Italians! They will "take care" of this, and a few other misconceptions... No guarantee though, on what else they might do. You have been warned, You Beautiful!))
• Before having the first morning coffee, nothing should be taken seriously, and
• That we take ourselves way too seriously anyway. Instead, we should laugh more. Especially at ourselves! And at the "boisterous" things we might be tempted to proclaim in a Blog. ((This round is on me!))

My mission

But here and now, only one thing counts: I am your coach.
What did you think we were doing here? Lol.

The gist is: This is for You.

You are here because you are looking for something. You have a fire in you to do, say or become more.
And I am here to help you fill the gap between your dream and your reality.

In fact, from now on:

Let's not call it "just" a dream - Let's call it a plan.

1-1 Coaching

My pledge is to challenge you to challenge yourself.
Because you deserve nothing less than this:
Be Empowered. Be Whole. Be Free.

Ready to be surprised?
Play the Rules is going to "dare" you with a new, revolutionary approach to coaching. We shall redefine the rules of the Game. Together.
Learn more about Play the Rules' coaching module.

- P, as in Play your own Champion: Energise
- T, as in Take a Breath: Relax
- R, as Reassess your Choices: Inspire

This is going to take your coaching experience to a whole new level.
Guaranteed!

Why heed the advice of a stranger? (Exactly!)

Now, you may be wondering, what qualifies me here?
Why should you heed the advice of a stranger? 

Right! You shouldn’t. Not on its own claim.
Because deceptions always lurk on the surface...

We tend to look up to authority. And we often follow it, almost blindly, without really questioning it. It would be all good there.
Except there are many idiots sheltered behind “intimidating titles”.
As there are also many very smart people without any...

Bottom line: When in doubt, above anything and anybody else, follow your own intuition.

Always question everything. Curiosity has its own reasons for existing.

After all, why just “trust” somebody, when you can be convinced by your own best judgement instead? 

So, I mean it: I do not want you to “trust” me.
Instead, I want you to just keep an open mind, try things out.
See what works best.
And then decide for yourself. 

As for me, I certainly do not want to follow suit with the crowd of overbearing or condescending authors talking down to readers, from a self-assumed “high pulpit” of authority and entitlement.

There are tons of righteous self-help books and blogs already. I want this to be a different journey for us. Playing the Rules indeed! 

What I offer through this journey is a challenge, a shift of perspectives when looking at conventional things… Starting from ourselves. 

So, I do not wish to win you over impressive qualifications or endowments.
Because I do not wish for any titles, degrees or academic awards to stand in the way of your own best judgement. 

This book shall speak on its own merit for you, and you alone.
You choose based on what you get along the way. 
It is simple: We start this journey together.
And you decide where it shall take you.

After all, this will be more about you than about me. While my collection of funny anecdotes might make you smile, or the glimpses into my own life even inspire a new course of action for you, it is what you discover about yourself that will make all the difference. 

At its core:

Play the Rules is not about “right or wrong”. It is about what “works for you”, and what does not. The aim is not to preach. But to inspire you… 

Ultimately, there should only be one voice you should follow…
The one inside You.

Behind the scenes...

Down in a “parallel universe”, when I am not writing, I keep busy as an international corporate lawyer. Traveling most of the time, and meeting customers for closing hopefully long-lived business deals. Then wrap them((the deals, not the clients - Lol)) in a nice looking package, with ribbons and all, and seal them with my best meant “legal blessing”.
Yes, that would be a pretty accurate description of what I do for a living.

I am lucky, because I LOVE travelling. 

Yet what I love, even more, is building connections with the people I meet. Creating bridges between only seemingly different sides.

If I shall vouch for one thing, both personally and professionally, is this:

There can be no real wins when one side loses.
The greatest wins are always win-win.

At any rate, it is always the people I meet, more than the places I visit, that make each experience truly memorable. And unique.

My frequent travels come handy when searching for inspiration for my own real-life stories. Plus, me being a lawyer, despite the “bad jokes” (okay, some of them could be funny…), somehow contributes to the matter-of-fact, no-nonsense approach infusing my own recounting.

My hope is that the perspectives I can share, along with those of the amazing people I have met along the way, may cast a new light also over your life.